Habit 3 Putting 1 and 2 together

In the book there are 7 habits to learn (obviously lol).  The first three are about private habits.  And once you have read through habit 1 and 2, the 3rd habit is about putting them together and actualizing them.

As the book describes is about power of will in leading, then managing oneself.  I particularily like that the statement he makes…

Manage from the left, lead from the right

I have been told that I am highly intuitive and this is a right brain function.  For me the challenge is managing myself as I don’t like to do things methodically or do the same thing every day.

This is a personal challenge I will have to over come.  I heard somewhere else that it is a good idea to do 3 hours of chores a day.  That to me means, do the managing oneself for 3 hours a day max…otherwise I will go insane cause I like to be creative and engage with people.  Its fun and fills me with energy.

I also like getting sales daily, cause it gives me a bit of a rush and then I just want to get more sales.  It also sort of validates the work I have to prove that it is working.  It’s a great feeling.

Also, its about being able to make a commitment to oneself to act.  Otherwise we are acted upon…essentially giving up our own will.

And, going being that…its about putting first things first.  With this in mind, E.M. Gray says he found that successful people do the things that unsuccessful people don’t want to do.  They still don’t like doing it, but they do it anyway.

Then, getting into time management or really personal management.  Where do you spend most of your time?  Find out how to best spend your time in this book.  It is quite fascinating.

Success Habit 2 – The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People


energepic.comIn running my own businesses I sort of got into a certain groove where I was easily taking on customers and sales were increasing.  Sometimes I would end of working 7 days a week and other times I would work 20 hours a week.  In all this time I didn’t really get the sense of satisfaction of arriving somewhere, it seemed I was always preoccupied with getting more customers.  And at the same time I was managing my businesses.  At some points I had a few going at the same time.

While reading the book it was already provided me with a mental framework for creating businesses and reminded me about following good principles for long term success.

And, while in my own business I would sometimes feel like I was doing a lot of different things…I probably could have used some guidance to make it a little easier and even to help with a growth plan.

In my cleaning business we had more than 100 customers a few staff and my partner all working 5 days a week.  I would end up managing the business and squeezing in time to do more marketing when I could.  I didn’t enjoy managing the business because I wanted to spend more time making it bigger.

There became some struggles when my partner was probably a little bored with cleaning and managing staff and didn’t have the management skills to be able to make her own job easier.

The challenge it seemed was to train my partner on management skills and at the same time be able to focus on making the business bigger.

So, in the book it explains a framework whereas management and leadership are two different things.  And that other business owners have struggled with the same thing.  As well, in my working with other business owners I have also noticed this struggle as well.  Many of them are trying to be the managers of their businesses and at the same time be the leaders of the business.  This creates a sort of dual focus, where managing the business can quickly become a full time job in itself and leave little time for focusing on leadership.

When I was running a restaurant, after a few years I had all the staff trained and performing well and literally only had 30 minutes of work to do each day and then I was bored.  However, the benefit at the restaurant was that it was part of a large corporation where I didn’t have to do any of the leadership of the company as a whole…none of the marketing, financial planning, product planning or anything that was handled by the head office.  In contrast, the small business owner has to consider a lot of things and typically do a 100 different “head office” type roles which is a feat all by itself.

So starting a business out, it is important to start on doing parts of some of the roles in the beginning and gradually build up to having a team of 30 people that can take on the 100 roles required in a large business.

Going from 0 employees to 30 employees is a huge thing, quite the learning curve for someone doing it for the first time, however many have done just that and built million dollar companies in the process.

I have learned a lot, made a lot of mistakes and continue to move forward, however I have learned that reading books about this stuff leads to a huge improvement in success.  Especially with the , essentially breaking down the process or the path that is required to achieve great things in 7 habits.

The first 3 habits are about inside stuff and the second 3 habits about about outside, and the 7th habit is about rejuvenating.  I have gone through one burnout in my life and could have learned the rejuvenating lesson earlier, which my have got me to avoid burning out.

I used to work hard and play hard and essentially burn the candle at both ends.  Now I seek to have a better balance.

The second habit is about the difference between managing and leading and what each role really entails to do it properly.

The 5 Steps To Success

I am reading Ray Dalio’s book and am thankful to find a book with well laid out processes for various principles in life…hence the name of the book is Principles.

Once of the principles he talks about in his book is the 5 Steps to Success.  I myself have had some great successes, both short and long term and also had some great failures.  I have spent some time looking back at them both and wondered what exactly it was that made one success and the other great.  Sometimes, basically setting a goal and then getting there no matter what was enough….one of the longest goals I set for myself took 4 years to achieve.  It was absolutely an amazing feeling when I achieved the goal.  It is one of the best things on my track record of success.

Once I achieve that goal, I essentially set a new one and did it in about 1.5 years.  And that was very rewarding as well.  It was one of those things that I knew I could do better then the people I have seen do it, so I decided to do it and did it very well.

Then, on the other hand, I have had some big failures, even on things I have worked at for years.  I have reflected on these and have come up with a few things I could have done differently and it would have worked out differently.  In other words, I could have succeeded, but I let the obstacle get in the way and didn’t figure out or take the time to figure out how to remove the obstacle, or what the next thing to do would be to keep things going in the right direction.

So, for me, reading this book about principles and learning Ray Dalio’s process for success helps, because it seems like it is a process he has refined over many years and used to deal with many challenges.  The more I think about it I realize that many parts of it are very similar to teachings by Tony Robbins, and others.  However the step by step part of it is unique to me and I am going to use it as a process for starting on new challenges and on working through the new challenges as well.

The steps are:

  1.  Set Clear Goals
  2. Identify and Don’t Tolerate Problems
  3. Diagnose the Problem to the Root Causes
  4. Design a Plan for Eliminating Problems
  5. Do What Is Set Out in the Plan

This type of stuff I have seen many business owners use and myself included, more on a being creative to solve an issue and move forward level.  Which essentially fits in with all the steps.  That being, a company sets out a goal and then starts on the path to achieving it.

I suppose the list of 5 steps might seem simplistic, however sometimes big things happen and emotions run high and it is easy to make a quick decision then days later realize it was not the best decision to make.

The book goes into good detail about each step and is very usefull in providing essentially a thinking process about how to best move through eat step and get the best result.

In case you want to check out the book, here is an affiliate link, which if you purchase from it, will help to support this blog.

3 out of 4 people you meet are hungering for this one thing!

I am a big fan of Dale Carnegie… and I have to admit, me just saying that has made me think about how I don’t like it when people are “fans” of some things.  So, I am going to rationalize this thing as being a fan of something good is good and being a fan of something not good is not good.

Anyhow, back to Dale Carnegie.  I have a friend with a business and sometimes I irritates me a bit that he seems to have sympathy for somethings where I don’t think he should.  It seems like it holds him back from achieving a business goal or life goal some times.  When this negative feeling comes up for me in those situations I was tending to think what he was doing is not what needs to be done…but I know I have to reflect on it more, cause maybe it was just me wanting some sympathy and seeing it given to someone else made me jealous lol.  Only really after reading the Dale Carnegie book and coming accross a certain sentence in the book have I admitted that I was wrong in my thinking on my buddy having to much sympathy.  And now I even realize that I probably love sympathy!  wow.  I finally admit it.  Apparently this is a pretty common thing to love sympathy cause even in  (affiliate link, if you buy this book, you will be supporting this blog) Dale Carnegie says “three fourths of the people you will ever meet are hungering and thirsting for sympathy.  Give it to them and they will love you.”

Being as I have a lot of respect for Dale Carnegie, because of reading his book, watching his videos, and from mentions by very successful people the two sentences above speak to me very load and clearly.

And this helps me to figure out what was going one when I have seen people not want to give someone sympathy, they reacted to the person expressing a need for it as an act of weakness.  However, as I have learned, vulnerability is power, so maybe the people that didn’t want to give sympathy didn’t feel loved, didn’t know how to love, or needed sympathy themselves, or maybe they just felt helpless at the time.  It seems to me, that it was something like that anyway.

So I guess I will have sympathy for the person that can not give sympathy as well and hopefully (fingers crossed) the would be a good way of leading them into a better way of doing things.  And I have to admit, I was not much better myself when I didn’t like my buddy giving someone else sympathy cause I probably just wanted it myself too lol.

This has become a good lesson for me, and I look forward to being more sympathetic in the future, and see what happens from it!

In case you want to purchase the book and support this blog…here is an amazon link to the book.

The 80 Twenty Rules and Thinking Fast and Slow

Yesterday I watched a Tai Lopez youtube video and he was at some amusement park and a random guy started talking to him.  Near the end of their conversation the guy mentioned he was reading a book call Think Fast and Slow.  Tai also highly recommended it so I took a look and found a bunch of videos on youtube about the book and the author.

So here is a video of a google talk the author did:

Its kind of interesting and this dude has one a nobel prize… and he is a psychologist but one a nobel prize in economics.  To me, that means this dude is on to something.  And I suppose that some dude that has one a nobel prize in economics might write a good book.

I haven’t read the book yet…but it is likely to be the next one I read.



The 50th Law – Robert Greene

I have recently been turned on to Robert Greene as he has an interesting story and how his book the 48 laws of power came about intrigued me.  And, who ever thought this would happen, be partnered with 50 cent to write the 50th law.

Here is a slick video about the book: